I am afraid of tragedy

I am afraid of tragedy.

I am afraid of tragedy.

Also, I had another migraine last night. Felt it coming on when the baby was put to bed around 9. Went to sleep with earplugs to try to kill the headache. Hubby woke me up at 11 when he came to bed. Migraine had turned into a full blown one, contrary to my hopes with the abortive sleeping attempt. Downed a Cambia and laid in bed, with every small toss and turn of hubby feeling like rough seas…prayed for the meds to kick before the nausea would inevitably cause vomiting. Fell asleep. At some unknown time afterwards, hubby woke me up again and asked how I was feeling, because the baby was very awake and inconsolable (unbeknownst to me…good earplugs). Nursed her in bed and everyone slept poorly until morning.

Baby is continuing her experimentation with plosives – /ba/, /be/ for words that start with b, especially “bird”, “bear”, and “baby”, and this morning she was saying /t/ and /d/ over and over again whilst just sitting in the bed. We think she has also mimicked “fish” and “nap” and “dog” (sounded a bit like /ot/), and she also says dada and mama though not always to the right person yet.

July 13, 2012 – Upon a Mid-Night Awakening

13 July 2012 2am upon a mid-night awakening

Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray in dreams my soul will keep
And if I die before I wake
I pray my dreams will forever take
Me to nowhere land

Where never before
Have dreams come true
What is truly nonsense
Feels like nothing new

Where everything that ever was
Will stay that way
And foggy days seem
just yesterday

That sinking feeling falling
Freely backwards heels overhead
Oblivion a twitch too close
Reality a hair too real

Fend off the predators
Fall madly in love
Make the unlikeliest of friends
Or all of the above

Such that it can’t be true
I would never believe you.

Just synchronization
Of day and night
Dear, it is alright
Dear, it is all right.

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July 5th, 2012 – Rough Cut

So I got to see the rough cut of FANTOMES for the first time today. Weird. Just cannot get used to seeing myself on camera.

So the one liner description of the film goes something like this: “Fantomes — about a black ops agent dealing with her unexpected pregnancy while on a routine job with her partner. Directed by Nik Green of Global Authority Media. Produced by Nik Green (Global Authority) & Yvette Lu of Rainfield Films. DOP Shane Smith of Red Salt Productions.”

And back to real life, where though I am not editing the film, I am still editing video for my project at the LABlab. EDIT ALL THE THINGS!!!

And now, a screenshot of my character, Amber, looking pensive:

FANTOMES: Amber | Global Authority Films | Rainfield Films | 2012

FANTOMES: Amber | Global Authority Films & Rainfield Films | 2012

June 25, 2012 – Leaving Her Behind

5:30 am

Someone asked me this weekend whether it’s harder to get into character or get out of it. I said into. But now that it’s over, definitely out of. Fuck, she just doesn’t want to die. She’s afraid of dying. So afraid. Her short life keeps flashing before my eyes, making me relive every wonderful moment with painful clarity. I’ll miss her so much.

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June 17, 2012 – A Dream of Clarity

6:30 am

A dream of clarity
I value art and perspective and respect strength in creation
Art will be with me wherever I go, the lover I hate but always I go back for more
I fear indifference more than fear or hatred
I feel loved and want you to feel love too
Let’s walk together and talk together and drive in cars without drivers
Let’s see the world for what it is, the neighbourhood of our creation
Let’s remember the things that make us good and put the rest to rest
Let’s fly a little and imagine more and more I will understand.
Let’s smoke and walk and drink and talk and feel what ought to be felt
For the time draws near when no more will appear
And then I will be old
And forget
And you will have to remind me
You will have to hold my hand
And tell me why you love me.

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OPERA! Puccini’s Gianni Schicchi June 7-10, 2012 #Vancouver

The Opera Project | Gianni Schicchi by Puccini | June 7-10, 2012
The Opera Project | Gianni Schicchi by Puccini | June 7-10, 2012

Woop! Less than 3 weeks away from this year’s opera production…and this year I’m actually in it…cover your ears now. I play Guccio, the dyer (who is, yes, usually a man, but hey gender bending is required in desperate times) and have approximately 5 (very short) lines.

This is an Opera Klass production, meaning that the entire cast (except me…i just do the website and flyers and stuff) is composed of students from Heidi Klassen’s voice studio. And they’re all effing BRILLIANT singers. They pay tuition to cover production costs and to develop their roles with Heidi over the course of several months…and the results are pretty darn good. If you’ve never been exposed to a wall of sound coming from a full cast of operatic singers, you’ve got to come see this show.

Tickets online (paypal) at http://theoperaproject.org or at the door (cash only).

April 16, 2012 – Big Sky Over #Vancouver

Another fun iPhone panorama captured using Autostitch app, edited in Camera+. 3418 x 1012. :)

April 16, 2012 | Big Sky Over Vancouver

April 16, 2012 | Big Sky Over Vancouver

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